Yes the CB’s sole purpose was talking to truckers.  See my step dad Bruce is a trucker.  and that means ourwhole lives were immersed in that life style

• Eating at truck stop restaurants
• Playing video games at truck stop lounges
• Picking out Christmas presents at truck stops
• Listening to truckers BS with each other
• and (here’s where the CB comes in) warning other truckers where the Police were.

Police were called “Bears”  which I guess is a nicer term than “Pigs”.  Hey truckers now how to be respectful to their local law enforcement.   but at the same time always on the lookout because if you get pulled over and your log books aren’t filled out just right…. guess what buddy? that’s right you are S.O.L

man I’m already wanting to start speaking trucker on ya’ll

$@^*&^ *&*st 7!@

sorry that just slipped

So this is how a little conversation went between my mom and trucker:

First we’d see a “Bear” driving past us.  and my mom would play all cool until the Bear was a little out of eye sight.  Then she’d reach for her CB mike and say

“Breaker breaker we have a Bear coming up on 1-15 going north bound.  He just passed us and I’m at mile marker 56.”

“10-4 copy that”

“10-4 over and out”

and then she’d look over at us kids all proud.  my mom has a big heart… always looking out for her fellow trucker.  Mom I’d tip my trucker hat at you if I had one. 

Also my mom loved to educate us on trucker etiquette.  Like how far to stay back, and how to flash your lights for them when its okay for them to move over into your lane, and how to basically not piss them off or they will form a convoy and chase you down and smash your car into smithereens. 

Sometimes I look at myself in the mirror and wonder:

“How in the world did I turn out so cool?”

and then you might wonder

“Wow Shellie has a mighty big ego.”

but then you didn’t know that while growing up *and primarily during the teenage years that I had to ride around in my mom’s car.  that looked a little like this:

Yes Folks you are seeing a 20 foot freaking huge tall CB ANTENNA on the top of that car!!!

WATCH IT! YOU WILL LOVE IT!

I love this song. Thought I’d share.

My siblings and I grew up old school.  Things were a little different back in the days of yore.  We had a little more freedom back then. So we did what any other kids who had free reign at Sunchase Apartment Complex in Ogden Utah did.  Roam the streets. 

We went to:

the bowling alley and played video games and ate potato logs.

the convenience store where we bought fake candy cigarettes.

the Ogden Temple visitors center.  to look at pictures of Jesus.

The rock selling shop and looked at opals, petrified wood, and other various gems.

The woods behind the apartment complex. 

In the North Woods there was an old tree fort that had beer bottles, old tires, and such.  Once we found a pair of velvet royal blue high heeled pumps and brought them home to give to our mom.  When she got home we asked her what her favorite color was.  “Blue” she said.  It gave us great pride to reveal from behind our backs the blue pumps. 

In the East Wood there was a Hobo Encampment.  (Well I think only one Hobo lived there but I’m not sure.)  There was an old mattress, some plastic bags filled with junk, some clothes and shoes laying around.

well We had a lot of fun back there.   We’d jump on the bed and sing songs.  And look through the junk.  and Imagine what the hobo’s name was and where he was at the moment, maybe pan handling, maybe enjoying a hunk of bread and bowl of soup at the soup kitchen, warming his hand around a fire in steel drum.   Such warm and tender thoughts while in actuality he was probably getting wasted on Alkihall.

One day we decided that our hobo was probably hungry so we went to the convenience store to buy him some candy. 

we bought:

a box of Good and Plenty

We then went back to the encampment and opened the box and dumped it on his bed. 

A couple of days later, we went back, and it was gone.  He had eaten it!!! we were so happy. 

It feels so good to serve doesn’t it :)

(me at the time of story)
 

There’s something about writing with a Bic Blue ink pen fine point that makes me happy.

and

on a side note.  we got our garage door opener back. 

plus

I have a new buisness idea

I live in a construction zone and there is a lot of construction workers.    Every day around noon a little catering truck comes driving around honking their horn to announce that they have food for sale. 

So I thought that I’d make some cookies and get some soda’s at costco to bring around in the afternoon and sell it for like $2. 

but I wonder if thats to low? 

how much would you pay for a big cookie and a soda?   

It’s time to play….

Who my baby daddy?
If I and _________ got together and had a love child this is what they would look like. So please guess below and may the best person win!

    a)

  b)

 
c)

d)
 
e)

I’m refererring to the word Puberty.

I say it like “Pewberty”

I know some people ( okay only one - my mil) who say it like this “Pooberty”

I was as some may say a “late bloomer”  I hit pewberty at the age of 15.  Probably due to the fact that while all the other girls and boys were “blooming”  I was getting pumped full of chemicals.  Which I think may have stunted my growth.  just a little. 

So one night I asked  my mom if we could go to the store. cuz I had finally gotten my “visitor” friend… I am so embarrassed even typing that!!! (lame!!)  anyway my mom asked me if I wanted her to go in with me or if I wanted to go in by myself.  I was 15 so I was like “Mahhh Om!!! I can take care of it! geez!!” 

So I go to the women section and look at all the purple and pink boxes and had no clue.  I was so nervous.   My hands were shaking… Finally I picked out some Tampax and walked up to the register.  I felt really dumb because I wished that I had at least a purse with me so I could hide the box behind it or something. 

So I was all shakey and scared because I was FOR SURE that when I got up there the lady was going to look at the box, look at me, look at the box, look at me, roll her eyes and then pick up a microphone and yell
“Price check on Tampax Tampons!  I need a Price Check on Tampax Tampons!!!”  and that everyone would stop dead in their tracks and look at me and some hot boy from my school would be there and he’d throw up or something.

I was so freaking scared of this scenario that I almost started crying.  anyway I walked up.  put it on the conveyer belt.  Watched it inch forward.  Thought about throwing a candy bar on the belt just so that it didn’t look weird to only buying tampons.   or maybe some tic tacs???? some chips??? what would be appropriate??? What do I DO!!! The Pressure!!! 

So the lady picks it up…. (here it comes… the glances!!! the PRICE CHECK!!!) and scans it.  Didn’t  even give it a second glance,  and places it in a bag. So I gave her my money, she gave me some change.  and It was no big deal.  Easy Squeezy. 

But at the same time,  What a let down. I don’t know why but I’m still kinda bummed about it.  :( 

Someday!!!

(remember that little song that some how goes like “SoooomeDay!!!) (thats how I want you to read that) 

P.S.

Do you say “pew” or “poo”?