So I’ve seen this on some blogs out there where they ANNOUNCE TO THE WORLD that they want the world to announce themselves. Huh?

Okay let me try this again.

So this morning at Stake Primary Meeting a girl I was sitting next to who I had never met asked if I was Shellie Kendrick. I said yes and she said “I read your blog. Someone told me about it right around the 4 B’s post” and I said “WHAT!”

not like  “What? :)” like “Oh Really? :)”

I Kind of half yelled “WHAT!” like she was my teenage daughter and she just sat me and her father down and told us not only was she pregnant, but also she was going to join the circus because the father of the baby was a dwarf who could swallow five swords.

But then the meeting started right after I yelled that like practically in her face and I felt so stupid.   Then I kept thinking man oh man I bet she thinks I’m so crazy, and mean, and weird.  I was like sweating bullets because I didn’t mean for that “what” to come out so forceful.  It just surprised me that she knew about my blog and plus taking 1 1/2 lortabs before I came didn’t really help with my brain capabilities. 

So for the rest of the meeting I kept trying to make eye contact with her and at least try to smile at her so she knew I was nice and not crazy.  Kind of like how a snake looks at a little baby bunny rabbit.  I wanted to like pat her ears and tell her it was going to be okay… shhh now… its okay… shhhhh…. please still be sucked into my blog… closer… closer…  CLOSER.  gotchya ha ha ha

So then after the meeting ended I turned to her and tried to apologize for yelling at her and then tried to in the minute and a half to like find out where she was from, what her favorite color was??,  would she rather date Edward or Jacob?  If she had a million dollars to spend WHATwould spend it on?  jk I didn’t go that far…

 but I did want to ask her was she on Facebook, did she have a blog??  basically I was trying so hard for her to see that I was nice and normal that I think I made the situation worse.  So she pretty much evacuated the situation. and I was thisclose to throwing myself at her legs and holding on for dear life until she would be forced to sit down and pry me off of her.  :(

So please for the love of all things good and awesome don’t let me be in a situation like this again where I end up looking like a big RTARDO!

if you read my blog it is now time for you to delurk yourself and become Free.  FREEDOM!  also for the first 10 delurkers I’ll send you something in the mail that has some sort of value. 

if you don’t have a blog and you read my blog did you know that all you need to do is write your name in the name spot and your email address in the address spot?

If you do read my blog and you have a blog you have to put in your url… because I want to get to know you too. 

Thanks I love you already and forever. 

So in 7th grade I performed a lip synch in one of my classes for some sort of project.

I lip synched and danced to this song.

uh I had to take the song off because it was soooo annoying that it was on autoplay. the song though is Love Cats by the Cure

then I followed it up a couple days later with an extra credit lip synch to this song.

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry thinking about my little 80lb bald self trying so hard to look cool.

or in other words

VEGAS BABY!

or in other words I’ve spent my winter  getting nice and plump like a little baby owl minus the feathers

So I’ve got a plan and it involves my friend Brooke

PLUS THIS

Which hopefully will equal looking Killer in this while sitting pool side

don’t worry it has straps and yeah I’ll need them

plus I really really really want to get my hair colored and cut LIKE THIS

I don’t know why but there is something built into my DNA that makes me want to bleach the crazy out of my hair and be blonde for like a couple of days.  I don’t think it would look good on me with my coloring- paley pale.  but maybe if I tanned a whole lot…? 

Just wouldn’t it be so cool to have blonde hair, retro polka dot swimsuit, parking myself under a cabana and sipping some diet coke with a marschino cherry floating on top. 

Anyway that is Operation Las Vegas minus the part of trying to be a gwen stefani video. 

 Wish me luck. 

So this past Wednesday while I was busy minding my own P’s & Q’s eating a huge bowl of cheerios sans milk with a big plastic spoon watching Oprah.  (true story)  I heard this siren go off.  and its wasn’t like a normal siren sound.  it was like Eerie, scary, the world is going to blow, kind of siren sound.  so I sat there for a few minutes and thought of what I should do. 

THEN… Georgia my dog started dancing around all crazy like in front of me.  and I was like “What’s going on girl?”  and she like put her ears back and looked really scared.  so I said “Whats that girl?  Are you saying thats a Tornado Siren”  and she like Kind of made a little bark  to the affirmative.  So I grabbed the kids and shoved them into this little space under the stairs and Dallen was like

“Mom whats going on”  all scared

and I was like “There’s a tornado coming”  really scary like because I want my kids to be scared of dangerous situations.  Seriously.  Like I don’t say “I don’t want you to go out in the street by yourself because I don’t want you to get hit”  I say “If you go in the street a car will hit you and you’ll get smashed” 

Dallen asked what a tornado was.  So in my best scary mom voice I said it was “a big wind that blows houses down!” Now you might think I’m going a little over the top but it made them want to stay in the dark, in this little tiny teeny space with me so we wouldn’t get hurt, and they didn’t make a peep and didn’t ask to get out. 

Then we heard Georgia scratching at the door and she wanted to get in with us too.  and I was like “Oh Jell her animal sense is kicking in telling her that the tornado is heading straight for us and she wants to be safe too.”    So then I really started to get worried that the Tornado really was coming Straight to our house and it was going to touch down right on us and suck us up… because animals can sense these things!!!

but after 3 minutes of being in crammed in there I couldn’t take it any longer and I told the kids we could sit on the couch together and watch the news and if it got any closer or the sky turned to black green and the hail broke out our windows  we could just high tail back to the closet. 

all in all we were safe and another disaster avoided.  phew. 

Here’s how this is all going to go down.

I will ask a question…

then the first commenter will answer my question.

then the first commenter will ask a question.

the second commenter will answer the 1st commenters question

and then ask a question.

and so on and so on. 

You can ask whatever you want.  You can only answer the Truth. 

Okay? :)

my Question

What perfume/cologne do you wear?

So the other night for Kristan Lowe’s birthday party we went and got pedicures and then to Lazette’s to eat food and talk, have a pillow fight, and dance around in cute underwear and bra’s. 

So as we were talking (er… I mean as we were all jumping on the bed in slow mo) the subject of how our husband’s proposed came up.

As you well know, being faithful readers of this blog, that Chad proposed to me with a quarter with a hole drilled in it.  But what you don’t know that he took me to Rock Canyon Park.  Now as I was telling everyone this, I explained that why he took me to Rock Canyon Park was because it was the scene of many “DTR’s” for us and the occasional “NCMO’s” when we wanted to get away from the watchful eye of roommates. 

Some of  the girls looked at me like “Huh?” “What the heck is DTR… and… NCMO”  and I was like thinking… “Huh?  Come on… I mean we’re all Mormon right?”  but then I realized something…you know how the say “the LDS church is the same everywhere in the world”  that does not cover dating slang. 

So I’d now like to educate ya’ll on some Utah Mormon Dating Terms

First you have

NCMO -  Non Committal Make Out  (pronounced NickMo)

You and your partner make out… sometimes for a night… sometimes over a period of a couple of days.  But both parties know there is no long term commitment. 

Which commitment in Utah County consists of at least

• one going out to dinner (Applebee’s or The Pizza Factory),
• a Jamba Juice excursion, and
• maybe going bowling. 

For NCMO you need none of that fancy schmancy stuff -  its making out in it’s purest form.   There are a couple of pre approved NCMO locations.  Squaw Peak, Rock Canyon Park, Alley behind Club Omni, either participants apartment -whichever one has no roommates at home. 

 How does one participate in NCMO… do you just go up to someone and say “wanna make out?”

These are just some examples that I made up for educational purposes.

If they are someone you know:

Say its this guy from your ward.  He’s really cute and he has really cute roommates.  Say you and your roommates go over to their apartment to hang out.  He might want to make out with someone.  So if he asks you to go check out his Book of Mormon on CD collection in his bedroom… this is akin to “hey wanna go make out?”  if you go to check out his BoM CD collection it might turn into a car ride up to squaw peak where you talk about his mission and other spiritual matters.  When you park at the top of squaw peak you might lean in to each other and make out for like an hour or two. 

If they are a complete stranger:

You might be at a UVSC dance where this hot security guard named Nate is checking you out while you dance and tells you that you remind him of Tiffani Amber Thiessen. 

 You then might give him your number and he might lend you his chap stick.  Using his chap stick might make him want to kiss you.  Which after several flirtatious checking with each other to see how the security guarding/dancing  is going, he might motion you to come over to a huge booming speaker where its kinda dark and he might kiss you for an entire Enrique Inglesias song. 

DTR - “Define the Relationship”

You go someplace, preferably after dark,  and sometimes after NCMO and talk about how you feel about each other and where you see things going.  Usually DTR is initiated, executed, and finished up with the girl doing 90% of the talking.  Things that are discussed are :  Do we make out to much,  (the smart guy always answers yes… and yes he feels bad too)  do we need to do more wholesome activities (the guy then discusses fun activities that he wants to plan for them… sledding and going to institute are huge ++++)  Do you see this going anywhere (Yes and then he might want interrupt you to play a Eagles song that reminds him of you to prove that he does see it going somewhere)  Now if you’ve got guts you might pull out the big guns

TEMPLE MARRIAGE

CHILDREN

Now this isn’t talked about in all DTR’s.  T.M. and Children are usually only brought out if you and your significant other have had at least 10 DTR’s.  Which is to say if you’ve had 10 DTR’s and your S.O. (significant other) is still coming around this might = true love and worth talking about which temple you’d get married in, how many children you’d want and what you want your dress to look like. 

I only initiated DTR’s with Chad… we would drive to Rock Canyon Park, sit on the grass overlooking the city, hold hands, and I would talk and talk about how much I liked him and did he see us being together, and did he feel bad that we made out so much.  Which he answered : He liked me too, he did see us being together, and no he did not feel bad that we kissed so much.  :)  Good thing.   Oh and DTR doesn’t end when you get married.  Right  honey? ;)

Rychelle 

had a give away  for this awesome print

and she drew my name.  Literally ;)

like when Rychelle has giveaways she draws pictures of the commenters… and then cuts up the pictures and puts them in a bowl.  I love it :)

Thanks Rychelle :)  I love you!

I got this idea from Lisa and thought it was a great idea. Plus I was one of her first three bloggers to comment!

The Rules

1. Be one of the first THREE bloggers to leave a comment on this post, which then entitles you to a handmade item from me.

2. Winners, you must post this challenge on your blog, meaning that you will Pay It Forward, creating a handmade gift for the first THREE bloggers who leave a comment on YOUR post about this giveaway!

3. The gift that you send to your Three Friends can be from any price range and you have 365 days to make/ship your item. This means you should be willing to maintain your blog at least until you receive your gift and have shipped your gifts. And, remember: It’s the Spirit and the Thought That Count!

4. When you receive your gift, please feel free to blog about it, sharing appropriate Linky Love!

If you are not one of the Top Three Commenters on this post, you can still play along. Please take the button and post it on your blog; start your own Pay It Forward chain, and encourage your blogging friends to do the same!

My Dream Box of Chocolates

(all milk chocolate)

• 1/2 lb of carmel chocolates
• 1/2 lb of mint chocolate truffles 
• 10 chocolate covered oreo’s
• 10 chocolate covered nutter butters
• at least 6 reeses peanut butter cups
• 10 chocolate covered mallow hearts
• 50 chocolate covered Cherry Licorice Nibs
• a couple of macademia nut clusters would be fine
• bag of Famos Amos chocolate chip cookies
• and a diet coke

 You?

Today was such a nice day.  I think it was probably in the 70’s here in Georgia.  So when Chad got home and after dinner we all went outside to practice baseball with Dallen. 

Dallen was holding his bat…  and then started holding himself and dancing around.

me: Dallen do you need to go to the bathroom?

Dallen:  No

me:  Are you sure?  It looks like you are holding yourself?

Dallen:  (very matter of factly)  No I’m just itching my tenders.

I seriously was trying so hard not to laugh that I had tears streaming down my face.  I love that little guy.

and Kung Fu Panda :)  (which is where he learned the term “tenders”)